Dating Advice - M*A*T*E*

Why Are We Afraid To Date Online?

Despite the fact that more people than ever are using online dating apps or dating websites, many people may still be embarrassed or afraid to try it out. There are multiple reasons behind this, but before I talk about them I’d like to share some statistics with you about online dating. E harmony states that there are about 40 million people are dating online, and 27% of young Americans report having used an online dating site, which is an increase of 10% from 2013. Dating online is becoming more popular every year, and it is steadily becoming a more socially acceptable way of finding a partner. Not only are more people trying it, but people of all age groups are trying it, so it appears the stigma that has been attached to it is quickly fading away. Another statistic I’d like to share with you is that 20% of committed relationships began with people meeting each other online. This shows us that online dating isn’t just for young people looking for flings, or for desperate people at all; it’s an effective way to find someone you are compatible with, and it works. Even though many people find love online and it’s becoming more normal in our society, here are some reasons that people may be hesitant to try it.

People Avoid Online Dating Because They Want A More Interesting Or Romantic “How We Met” Story

If you’ve ever asked your friends or family members how they met their loved one, chances are they told you about how they approached them in a grocery store, a party, or through a mutual friend. There are endless different ways to meet people, and not too long ago, that was the only way to meet people. If you meet your partner through an online dating app or website, you might find that telling others that you met online to be boring, or worry that they will think it’s a lame way to meet someone. While it might not be the most interesting story in the world, if you meet someone online you are more likely to be a better match for each other. You’re able to learn about what the person’s interests are, what qualities they’re looking for, and their beliefs and values. Knowing this before you physically meet them is going to not only make both parties more comfortable before physically meeting, but it increases the chances of a long-lasting relationship. How we meet our partner isn’t the most important thing in the world; the time spent with them and the memories you make from that point on are what’s most important.

They Feel That It Makes Them Seem Desperate Or Undesirable

We can’t expect to be able to change how others feel about certain things, and that applies to online dating just as much as anything else. While it’s true that some people might think using the internet to find love makes them desperate, it’s far from the truth. Dating online simply allows us to show the world exactly what we’re looking for, and provides a much larger selection of people to look through. Some people find it more difficult than other to approach strangers and try to get to know them, and using a dating app or website can make it easier to get to know people before you try to see them in person. Consider the idea that there are millions of people dating online. If it is true that only the desperate or undesirable seek out love online, then there are millions of desperate people looking for love. Look at it this way, that is something you already have in common with the others who are online looking for love. Perhaps it is not so bad to find others who are facing similar circumstances and use a similar avenue to accomplish a goal.

One word of caution though, going into online dating with preconceived notions about the ease or difficulty of online dating may cause you to be disappointed if things do not go your way. My advice is, have an open mind and give it your best effort.

They’re Afraid Of Scams

While online dating can be very helpful for people trying to search different areas for love, there are still people out there who are going to try to scam others. People may be afraid to try online dating because of this, but there are always going to be scammers in all areas of our lives, and we can’t let that stop us from trying. You might meet someone online that tries to convince you to send them money, and you might be catfished, but as long as you’re careful about who you decide to meet and never give away any sensitive information to people you don’t fully trust, you should have no problem in using a dating website successfully.

Keep in mind that scammers are not only online. They use all avenues to scam people out of their hard-earned money. The internet opens you up to a vast number of scammers, more than you would have come into contact with in everyday life. That being said, dating sites is not what puts you at risk, being on the internet puts you at risk.

They Don’t Know How To Start

There are hundreds, if not thousands, of dating apps and websites available today. Some of those sites may be dedicated to a specific group of people, and others are for anyone to join and they allow you to search for people based on your interests. This can make it daunting for those who are new to online dating, or who are considering trying it for the first time. With so many options to choose from, people might not know which website to choose, or how to set up their profiles on any given site. For those who want to date online and do not know where to start, the temptation would be to choose a free site or a free membership and see what happens. I would recommend a slightly different route to save time. Ask an expert how to choose a site. There are many sites out there and they do not all offer the same services. It is best to choose a site based on your needs instead of choosing a random site and hoping that you get what you are hoping for. Let an expert point you in the direction of a site based on your needs, then you sign up, fill out your profile and start meeting people. If you are on a dating site for a while and you are not getting the results that you want do not be afraid to turn to an expert again for guidance. It is the least you can do before you give up. Online dating is very difficult i.e. very few people will see success from online dating. This is not because online dating does not work, but because very few people know how to get what they want from online dating. The best place to begin is at the beginning.

They’re Afraid People They Know Will See Them Online

Another reason someone may be nervous about starting their search for love online is that they’re afraid people that they know are going to find out they’re a member of a dating website. While you may not want others to know that you chose to look for a partner online, it’s important that this doesn’t stop you from trying it. You never know who you’re going to find online, and you may even find the person you spend the rest of your life with through a dating site. If you keep yourself from trying it simply because you are afraid of people finding out about it, you are letting the opinions of others affect your life and potentially keep you from finding the love of your life. Also, if someone you know does see your profile, this shouldn’t concern you because it means that they are using online dating as well.

If you ever need a hand or have any questions, feel free to leave them below and I will be more than happy to help you out.

All the best,





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