A good man. Who is a “good man”? I think just as with a good woman, this is open to interpretation. That being said, I believe most women would agree on several criteria that would qualify a man as being “good”. Aside from the obvious qualification of not being a criminal of any kind, I believe that in order to find a good man you must first define who or what you consider to be a good man.
I believe that most women, at their core, would describe a “good” man as someone who is responsible.
By responsible, I mean someone who is capable of being trusted. A responsible man may be trusted with your well-being, with your children’s well-being (if you have kids), with the well-being of anyone in his life who requires his trust. When I think of the kind of person, I can count on I describe that person as responsible and I believe it is a good quality to have as a man and as a person.
A woman would also consider a man who is able to take care of himself and a family financially to be a “good” man. In this sense “good” does not have moral value, but it does have security value. Humans, in general, want to be safe and secure. They do not want to be blind-sided by unknown circumstances and they certainly do not want to have to worry constantly about whether they can keep a roof over their head or whether they can have a car to drive tomorrow. Women want security even if they are independent and can take care of themselves. They have a need to know that if someday they cannot provide for themselves then they can depend on their man to take the reins and carry on. I know there are some men who believe that if a woman thinks of financial security as a “good” quality for a man then she must be a gold-digger, but I differ from that line of thinking because, from a human perspective, it just makes sense.
Another quality of a good man is being able to love someone besides himself.
It is unfortunate, but there are many people today who are extremely selfish. It is not even entirely their fault, but a result of their upbringing. As a society we have bred more and more selfish individuals as the concept of individualism is taught in homes, schools etc. I am not saying that individualism is a bad concept, I am saying that it leads to less caring individuals. Fortunately, there are still men who believe in family and can care about others. These men often go out of their way to help others and contribute to society without expecting anything in return.
A good man in my opinion and I believe most women would agree, is a faithful man. If a man cannot be faithful to you when he has made it clear that he wants you exclusively, then he is not a good man. I do not believe that “good” men cheat on their wives or girlfriends no matter what his excuse is. If you are involved with a man and he belongs to someone else, then you are not with a good man. A good man would free himself legally from any entanglement that would prevent him from being with you in the way that he should be.
A good man would always have your back.
Support is one of the most valuable aspects of any relationship. When thinking of the many men who would throw you under the bus when it suits them, you can understand the value of a man who would stick with you through thick and thin. A good man is one who would listen when you just need to vent and who would defend you even when his friends and family think the worse of you.
I could go on about the qualities of a good man, but that is not why I am writing this blog. I simply stated some qualities of a good man so that you would know that to find one you need to know what you are looking for. You cannot find something if you have no clue what it is. There are women that meet good men but let them slip through their fingers, so to speak because they have no idea what a good man is. So now that you have an idea about who or what is a good man, how do you find one?
You still have to choose based on your lifestyle and seek the specific qualities that you expect in a good man. In other words, if you like going to the club, a man who has an aversion to clubbing would probably not be your best match. Although I cannot tell you where to find a good man I can tell you how to find a good man. To find a good man requires some self-knowledge. You have to know yourself and what you constitute as a “good man”. You must also decide what you are willing to overlook to find your man. The truth is, most women would want a man they consider to be “hot”. Is there anything wrong with that? No! Absolutely not! The good thing about this though, is that “hot” is in the eye of the beholder so this is something that will be determined on an individual basis. There are good men who do not show up in the packaging that you have in mind and you must decide if you want a “good” man or a good-looking man. As we know, these things do not always come together.
To find a good man you have to specify to potential suitors exactly what qualities you are seeking in a man. Click here to read more about dating with a purpose. If you only say that you want a good man, just about every man you meet will claim to be exactly who you are looking for. It is imperative that you specify what qualities you are seeking in your “good man” so that you may attract and find this person.
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